And His Glory Appears Like The Light From The Sun

The past month of my life has not been what I would call "my best days".  I had finally graduated school with my Masters and all that was left was to pass my boards.  I knew God had my future in His hands so of course I was beyond devastation when I found out I did not pass. I had a day to think about it and then I picked myself up and told myself God had a reason for all of this and I just needed to trust Him.

Trust....such a small word, yet one of the hardest things to do.  Over the next few weeks I would definitely begin to understand the meaning of Trust in God.

Shortly after finding out about the test, I went home to be with my family and start preparing and packing for the cruise we were about to go on to celebrate my graduation.  My dad had not been feeling  so well but we were praying that God would heal him and rest and relaxation in the Caribbean would do him some good.  We were wrong.  The day we went to port was an exceptionally bad day for him and so we called it quits and decided it might not be the smartest thing to do to get on a boat and sail across the ocean if you don't feel too well.  We drove all night and made it back home and within three days dad was admitted to the hospital.  Thank God we did not get on that boat!

After many tests they finally discovered what was wrong with my dad and did surgery to fix the problem.  It became clear that he was going to be out of commission for awhile and since my sister had to go back to New Jersey and my mom back to work, I was going to be the one to stay home and take care of him.

God really is great!  At that moment I realized if I had passed my test then I would be having to head to work now too, but instead I got to spend some wonderful time with my dad!  My family has always been a close one but these past two weeks I really got to spend some quality father daughter time and really got to see how wonderful of a man my dad is. God allowed my dad to turn into a daddy again and steal my heart all over again! 

I was walking early one morning and I was watching the sun rise and the song His Glory Appears by Hillsong came on and the lyrics 

"And His glory appears 

Like the light from the sun 

Age to age he shines 

Look to the skies 

Hear the angels cry 

Singing holy is the Lord" 

really touched me.  I finally realized how much God loves me! He has a magnificent plan for each and everyone of His children.  His plan more than often does not match up with mine, but look at the wonderfulness that comes from His plan. Look how He can turn a devastating situation into something so sweet and beautiful. We just have to remember to TRUST that He knows what lies ahead and He knows what is best.

It's going to be WILD!

These past few months I have been in a fog, therefore my blogging has been on the back burner!   I have been so focused on trying to get done with school and keeping my eyes on the finish line that I have been walking through my life as if I was a robot.  Get up, go to work, work some, go to lunch, work some more, head home, eat dinner, go to bed, and then get up and start it all over again.


Do you know how many blessings a person can miss when they are walking around as if nothing else existed? Many!  Now that I am done with school (yay finally) and trying to study for my boards and still enjoy summer, I am beginning to realize just how BIG our God is and how much He really does care about me.


God has prepared a beautiful future for me and has faithfully helped me through each and every milestone, but the sad thing is sometimes I do not even notice.  God has gotten me through OT school (with my insanity)!  God has given me beautiful and wonderful friends who encourage me and speak life into me!  And the best thing of all is God has prepared a doorway, okay lets not even say prepared, lets be honest, God swung a doorway wide open for me to have a job doing OT, like I love, but also being able to do OT in Africa!!  How cool is that!  My two biggest passions......all wrapped up in one job!  I was blown away! 


I figured my dreams of doing OT in Africa and hopefully eventually opening up a medical clinic would take years and thousands and thousands of dollars.  I knew it would have to take many people and something really big to make this dream come true.  Boy was I wrong!  Within a few short minutes of me speaking out my passions and dreams.....they were being created into a plan...a real plan that could happen within a year!  HOW BIG IS OUR GOD!!! 


 I was talking to one of my dear friends and telling her the wonderful news and all about where I will be working and how excited I am and I said a few simple words to her that I feel like completely sums up my future......"It's going to be WILD!"  I have no idea what my future holds, except that I have an apartment for another year, and I have a wonderful job doing what I love, other than that who knows....but what I do know is that God is not done with me!  God has just began and if I let him continue to guide me and if I walk the path he has set for me then "It's going to be WILD".  And for once in my life, I think I am a little bit ready for some WILDNESS, GREATNESS, and the UNKNOWN!


God cares....He really does!  So don't walk around like a robot (even though its so hard not too) and miss His plan and His blessings....who knows, maybe your future holds a bit of WILDNESS too!

"Let God Impress You"

As of lately, there have been several things happen in my life.  I am now living with my parents until the end of march while I complete my first 3 month rotation, I am having to start making decisions on where I would like to get a job/where I would like to live, and I am having to remember that God has got all of this planned....I just have to be willing to follow.  Such a scary thing to do sometimes.  

I was talking to an amazing friend the other day and was telling her all about the decisions I was having to make and the fact that I have no idea what I want to do with my life, but how piece by piece God is showing me small puzzle pieces of my life, He is simply handing me joy!  After I told her all of this, I said " I wish everything would just hurry up and be figured out....I am tired of waiting and not knowing what will happen with my life."  To which her response was one of such simplicity but profound none the less.  She said in that sweet wonderful voice, "It seems like God is trying to impress you and show you all that He can do.....why don't you just sit still in the place where you are and let God impress you with his wonderfulness and his love."  

WOW!  What a beautiful phrase!

When I began to think about her response, I thought to myself, "Why would God want to impress me?"  Well why not?  God knows all that is happening in my life and I honestly believe that He gets so excited before revealing another piece to the puzzle.  We know that God loves to love us and bless us, why would he not want to impress us with the wonderfulness that he can give!  

So here I stand humbly before you God, not knowing where my life will end up, but undoubtedly impressed by you!

Drummer Boy / I Heard The Bells

So I am one of those weird people who starts listening to Christmas music BEFORE Thanksgiving....I know I know ridiculous huh? I was driving back to Conway and I wanted a little pick me up music so I put on Mercy Me's Christmas Album and before I know it, God spoke to me right then and there.

Lately, I have been wondering about life in general.  Where am I going?  What am I doing with my life?  Is this it?  What does God have in store for me?  Then as I was listening to the song Drummer Boy (one of my favorites) the lyrics "I'll play my best for you, I'll play my best for Christ" came on and immediately I was convicted.  Am I playing my best for Christ?  Am I living my life the best I can for Christ?  I quickly realized that no I am not playing my best at all.  At one point, yes I was, but recently I do not think I have been.

The next song that came on after Drummer Boy was I Heard The Bells, and immediately God spoke again.  At one point the lyrics say, "I can hear you, I can hear you" and of course the lyrics are talking about hearing the bells, but I felt like God was saying "Carleigh, I can hear you. All the times you speak to me and wonder what is going to happen in your life, I just want you to know I can hear you, I promise, and if you just hold on a bit longer you will see what I have in store for you."  

It is amazing what two Christmas songs can do in just a few minutes, and it is amazing how God can use two Christmas songs to speak such profound words.  So I would like to remind you, just how God reminded me, that He does hear you, and I would like to challenge you to look at your life and see if you are playing your best for Christ.

Dreams and Realities

I heard a woman speak last night and I honestly feel like everything she said God was telling her is exactly what God is telling me.  She spoke of her dreams and how she wanted to work for a fashion magazine.  Through the years she began to give her heart to God, her dream of working for a fashion magazine was still there but she was beginning to have bigger dreams.  One day she got the opportunity to either work for a famous photographer or work for a church and help organize mission teams.  She surrendered and gave up her old dream for the dream God was instilling in her.  Once she began doing mission work she fell in love with the places and the people.  She wanted to stay in Mozambique, Africa forever because she could see miracles happening every day and she felt so close to God there.  She felt like He was speaking to her like never before there.  When she asked God if she could stay He said no.  He said you have to go back to reality so that I can grow you and grow your faith for you to walk out this dream.

Isn't it funny how God knows what is best for us?  I have had so many dreams.  Dreams of getting married by the time I am 24 (got two years to go haha), dreams of being an occupational therapist, dreams of having a family......those dreams are still there but they are being outshined by crazy impossible dreams that God has placed in my life.  Dreams that I think about and wonder how will this ever come true.  When will I ever get to go back to Africa?  How will I ever have the money or the resources to start a clinic in Africa?  Will I ever have the guts or money to adopt children from Africa?  The funny thing is I always ask these questions but I have never asked why not now. I know I am waiting, but waiting for what?  

The truth is I am in my reality looking eagerly at my dreams because God is growing me.  Growing me as a person, growing my faith, and quite possibly growing my dreams.  I am in this reality because my dreams are not ready to be reality in my life right now.

Until that that reality comes, I will keep dreaming.

Beautiful Hurricane

Within the past week I feel like everything has gone wrong....so wrong that when I tell others about my week, they either laugh (which now looking back it does all seem funny) or say "these things never happen to a normal person....only you."

It all started with my bug shield flying off my car while I was driving down the interstate (sorry car behind me!).  From there it has gone to paint being ripped off of my car by flying bug shield, my brake light going out, the battery to my keyless entry to my car died, my phone touch screen is not working, the smelly fridge was fixed but then the ice maker stopped working, there was no diet coke at the restaurant  today so I order diet Dr. pepper and then the diet Dr. pepper runs out (in which the waitress informs me how odd it is because this never happens), to finally ending my day today with stepping in a puddle to only then find out the hard way that I have a hole in my shoe.  

Nevertheless, I think I am experiencing some spiritual warfare.  

So today as I was driving and thinking about all the things going wrong in my life and I turned on some worship music and heard two songs that were meant for me at that moment.  Phil Wickham's "Your Beautiful" and then Jimmy Needham's "Hurricane".  As I was listening to these songs, I just began to think how beautiful God is, and how beautiful life in general is. God is there always in my life no matter if its going beautifully or not so beautifully. 

 I am sure He laughs at me when I step in puddles to only then find out I have a hole in my shoe, because maybe that was His way of saving me from wearing those shoes when it is raining.  And I know He comforts me when I am at my last straw, and then I just start crying because I dropped my keys or something small like that.  Because what if my "walls need to be torn down" and "destruction is what I need" so that I will turn to Him.  

God knows "far better than I" and even though my world is crazy and it seems like everything keeps going wrong, I have found myself talking to Him more and enjoying the peace He brings into my life, because only He can bring that peace.  

So this crazy, chaotic life of mine is my Beautiful Hurricane.

Control Freak

I am publicly admitting that I am a control freak!  God has definitely been showing me that lately.

Everything that has been happening or not happening in my life right now, I seem to be complaining about or "discussing with God" a lot about how I do not like it or I need this or it should go like this.  I seem to be telling God how I thought my life was going to turn out and then getting mad at Him when it does not turn out that way.

The fact about it is, is that my future is very very unknown at this time.  Everything is up in the air and that unbelievably bothers me, because I cannot control something if I do not know what is going to happen.

How brilliant is God!  If I do not know what is going to happen then I have to give up my controlling obsession and just trust in Him and let Him control what happens.

I have to remember that God knows me better than myself, and He has, is and will always be faithful to the promises He has made.  If I could just let Him control the little things in life and the big things, then yes things definitely might not happen or turn out like I planned, but I know they will be so much greater than anything I could have imagined.  

I just have to give Him complete control!